I am so frustrated with my current relationship with AOL. I mean, we’ve been on the rocks for awhile, and I often consider leaving, but the hassle of switching accounts, DSL lines, etc, always makes me stay. Laziness is the WORST reason to stay in a relationship, I know, and I should go, but I just haven’t. Yet. But lately, weird things are happening. Like all of a sudden, I wasn’t getting emails from people who claimed to be sending them. Then I checked my spam folder, and there they all were…suddenly, everyone was apparently spam. (Not entirely far from the truth, but not true.) I also have a campus address that bounces to both AOL and another account: things keep popping up in the other one that never make it to AOL. Hmmmm. Maybe this is normal, everyone misses emails from time to time, but it makes me nervous, wondering what I’m missing. Of course, it’s probably just Viagra offers or urgent pleas for bank account borrowing from Nigeria, but what if it isn’t? What then?

Or, I could take the more calm approach, and assume that what is meant to get to me, will get to me, and leave it at that. Yesterday in class we read “How to Become a Writer” by Lorrie Moore (my favorite short story of ALL time, and one I assign to my Intro classes first thing, every semester.) We discussed how it covers the struggle of writing, without a full happy ending, and how hard it is to persevere at something when it seems like you aren’t getting anywhere. I said that regardless, I like to think that everything happens for a reason, and one of my students sighed in this very world-weary way and said, “Yeah, just keep thinking that.”

I could totally understand where he was coming from. But the thing is, I have to believe that. Because otherwise I’d go nuts. About email, and a lot of other things. You do what you can to get by, day to day, and having a sense that there is SENSE helps me. As does chocolate, sitcoms, good books, my dogs, and Chinese food. Like I said: you do what you can.

have a good day everyone….