When I was younger, I always used to think it was so funny when my mom got suddenly up in arms about something she claimed was clear evidence about the end of civilization as we knew it. Like really sexist music videos, or bad grammar in public places, anything that just really pushed her buttons. Then I got older (sigh) and now I find myself doing the same thing. Like yesterday, when I read this article about greeting cards for adulterers.
Yes, it’s true. Now, there is a line of cards for people who are cheating. When you just can’t say it yourself, you can purchase a card for your mistress/boyfriend/lover to convey your feelings. I know there are greeting cards for everything now—I even wrote a book with a character who made a living off of the trend—but still, isn’t this a bit much? The bad karma alone seems reason not to even look at the cards, much less buy one. It just made me feel really creeped out, and then kind of sad, and then annoyed. Just like my mom used to feel whenever she sat down with me to watch a few videos on MTV, only to sigh loudly and shake her head at the sight of scantily clad girls gyrating on cars. I get it now. Say it with me: what is this world coming to? Oh, I don’t even want to know.
Maybe I just don’t get this because I’m not a card person. Some people are REALLY into greeting cards: in fact, I know people who regularly shop at Hallmark the way I do at the Gap, dropping in and picking up a few things every few weeks or so. These are the kind of people who have a greeting card stash, a boxful that they can go through at any time to find the perfect card for that special occasion. They never miss a birthday, or anniversary. They are not like me, rushing out at the last possible minute (or even later) to pick something up and slap a stamp on it, then pray it makes it its destination somewhere near on time. These are also the kind of people who are very good at wrapping gifts: the tape never shows, and their bows are perfect. Whereas I, in a very short-lived job at a local department store, was so bad at the complimentary giftwrapping I was moved out of customer service. Still, even these kind of people might balk at a card for cheaters. At least, I hope they would.
Oh, I feel a rant coming on. I can’t help it. Maybe I’ll call my mom…