The Five!

1. Yesterday, I finished signing my tip-in sheets. That’s 3500 of them, each one with a signature, and it took me….well, longer than I thought yet not forever. Which is a nice little gray area I will gladly take. For those who haven’t been following, tip-ins are single sheets I sign that are then bound into finished copies of my new book, What Happened to Goodbye, so people can buy signed copies. A lot of folks have asked where these will be available, and the answer is…I have no idea. But I will try to find out! Other burning questions I’m seeing here in the new year that I can quickly respond to: When will the book be out? May 10. Where will I be touring? Not sure yet, hope to know sometime next month. Will I survive the stress and anxiety of worrying for the next five months or so if people will like this novel? Umm…that one I can’t answer yet. Or ever. Oh, well, two out of three.

2. The new season of Jersey Shore premieres tonight, and I have to say, I will probably watch. Oh, I feel dirty just admitting that. The cast was on GMA this morning, and I pretty much suffered cultural whiplash going from an in-depth discussion about John Boehner and the new Congress to one that involved the new girl, Deena, talking about how her panties fell off her first night in the house. WHOA! G-Step and Robin looked equally traumatized. In a perfect world, I wouldn’t even know who Snooki and J-Woww are, and I’d be dedicating this space to a discussion of Nova or Frontline. But this world isn’t perfect. I mean, how can it be when Deena’s panties just, you know, “fall off?” I rest my case.

3. I just spent a full minute making SURE that I spelled John Boehner’s name correctly up above, as I did not want a repeat of what happened when I misspelled Justin Bieber’s name on Twitter. I am still traumatized by the names I was called, for real. Those girls are SERIOUS! Then again, I can’t imagine that John Boehner, who is the new Speaker of the House, has that kind of rabid following. But you never know. And as someone whose name is always spelled wrong—even on the box of 3500 tip-in sheets I just signed—I do my best to prevent doing it to others. Seriously, though: can you imagine if Boehner was as popular as Bieber? The mind boggles.

4. They now have an app store for Mac Laptops and desktops. Oh, dear. This is just what I don’t need. I have this really bad habit of wasting entirely too much time shopping around for things I think will Solve All My Problems, Get Me Completely Organized and Basically Make My Life Easier. Hate to say it, but there’s really NOT an app for that. Although I keep thinking there MUST be, so I go look again, and the cycle continues. I mostly stick to free apps, and avoid games entirely….except for Animatch, which I play with my daughter. It does not solve all my problems, but makes long waits at the bank or post office bearable for both us and everyone around us in line. That is worth ANY price, people. You parents know what I mean.

5. I’m sure regular readers have noticed lately that I’m having a bit of internal conflict about this blog. I checked back the other day and I’ve been writing it now for nine years and four months. That’s a LOT of entries, and more and more I’ve been wondering if anyone reads blogs anymore, or if our collective attention span has gotten to the point where we can’t handle more than 140 characters at a time. I keep going back and forth, wanting to quit, wanting to continue. But now, I’ve made my solid decision: the blog stays. My entries might be lame at times, or short, but I’m not stopping, and additionally, I’m going to stop even TALKING about stopping. So there you go. Brace yourself for even more TV talk, self-promotion (I do have a book coming out in May, you know) and whatever else pops into my distracted, anxiety-ridden head. As Ben Lee said, we’re all in this together. Right?

Have a great weekend, everyone!